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Don’t Beat Yourself Up – Be Yourself!

Last month we explored the concept of New Year’s Resolutions and ways that you can leverage your M.O. to be more successful. There are several “inspirational” mantras that can help you or hinder you as you move toward your self-improvement goals.  Here are three that well-meaning friends and family (or enemies) may use to encourage you, but could backfire depending on your M.O.

Anything is possible, if you just put your mind to it – Yes, people can achieve many different things when they work hard, but too often people try to encourage others to work hard on the wrong goals. Someone whose strength is seeing the big picture without getting bogged down in details can research and write a long memoir, but should they? Motivating someone to work hard to achieve the wrong goal isn’t helpful – it just makes people hate hard work since the payoff isn’t something they cared about anyway. You should focus on the goals that are meaningful and productive for you. When you work hard to achieve that goal, your hard-earned sense of accomplishment will make you more likely to want to work hard to accomplish the next meaningful project.

Just think positive - visualize positive outcomes – This may work for some people, especially those who have a 1-3 in Implementor, because they tend to be more abstract and have a need to imagine and visualize. People who are more concrete (7-10 in Implementor) may need to have actual pictures up in the physical space where they are going to work-out/eat/relax/improve.

If you don’t follow a plan, you are planning to fail – For many people, the requirement to follow a strict plan almost always guarantees that they will fail – especially if they are resistant in Follow Thru (1-3) and insistent in Quick Start (7-10). These people need change and flexibility. Those who are insistent in Follow Thru need to have a plan to follow (hopefully their own) and will have trouble without one.

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